"Hi I'm Alec, are you the babysitter? Mommy said that we can go to the park if you want to and feed the ducks. Do you like legos?"
"Yep, hi, my name is Andy." I said, kneeling down, "Let me talk to one of your parents first, ok?"
While I was saying this, Alec was looking me up and down.
"Yeah ok, hey, Andy, do you use boy words or girl words, or the other words but I can't really 'amember them?"
I looked curiously at his mom, Amelia, who was busy tiding up the table.
"Oh," she said, "he can't remember the word 'pronouns.'"
"Ah," it clicked, "I use boy words. What about you?"
"I use boy words, too. Do you like legos?"
"Of course I do!"
In that 45 second exchange Alec showed me that he knew more about gender than most adults I've met in my 23 years on this planet. [Read the full post.]
Andy shares some great perspectives on how children with transgender parents learn to deal with questions about gender: you ask. As he says, "You don't guess or dance around the subject or hope somebody else clues you in or wait for another person to use a pronoun so you can use the same one. You ASK." Unlike many of us adults who stumble around trying to read cues from other people, stressing over using the wrong words, kids learn to just ask: "Should I use boy words, girl words, or something else to describe you?"