Offbeat Families runs these advice questions as an opportunity for our readers to share personal experiences and anecdotes. Readers are responsible for doing their own research before following any advice given here... or anywhere else on the web, for that matter.

What can I do to come to terms with a "bad" birth experience?

By on Aug 6th
I've seen lots of resources online for dealing with poor labor care, lack of support, and unwanted interventions during childbirth, but none of those resources deal talk about labors and births that were just bad on their own. I had a precipate labor — which means from start to finish, the entire process took less than three hours and the baby was expelled quickly. My labor and delivery included falling down the stairs, choking in the car, having to consent to an epidural, barely getting it in time, etc (among other delights).

The interventions and hospital staff are the only things that made labor bearable. After taking some time to process it, I realized that there was really nothing I could have done to change it — despite the well-meaning advice from friends. I dropped out of a class for new and expecting mothers after the class leader told me that they'd appreciate if I didn't share my birth story because "We don't want to frighten anybody who hasn't had their baby yet."

My question to you all would be: if any of you had a not so great experience, or needed to talk about the negative aspects of labor and birth, where do you go? Where have you found places (other than here) to talk frankly about experiences that weren't so great and get support without any judgment? — Ashley

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